One would have thought that since both Rob Mariano and Amber Brkich are most noteworthy for their neanderthal legacies on Survivor — both appearing twice on the broadcast before winning, as a quasi-couple, one million dollars (and change) on the All-Stars Finale — that when these two Survivalists did have a wedding they'd surely invite some of their island coconuts along for the fireworks. I half expected Jeff Probst to jet ski straight from the surf onto the beach with an urn under his arm containing the wedding rings. Curiously, I could recognize no one from Marquesas or Africa or Panama stepping up for a piece of the gargantuan wedding cake. Were the feelings that broken on the beach?

By David W. Taylor (Email Me)
Reality Reel Media
05.29.05

Yet sitting right behind the Mariano/Brkich families themselves during the actual matrimonial sacraments were Ray and Deana from The Amazing Race 7 (a Race Rob & Amber didn't even win) and next to these two were Amazing Race Executive Producer, Bertram van Munster and Race Co-Creator, Elise Doganieri. Knowing Rob's fetish for, mildly put, unsentimental bonds with fellow humans, besides immediate family and a few beer swilling Bostonians, this was indeed stunning. And notwithstanding the intrigue and whiff of collusion (much of it fanned by Rob himself, with a wink) that wafted over the Amazing Race Seven Airport Mystery in San Juan, co-starring Uchenna & Joyce, he obviously wasn’t harboring any lingering ill will.

<img src=http://www.realityreel.com/images/robamberwed.jpg>

Not so stunning but equally fun to watch was Rob Mariano being Rob Mariano. And this must be most of the reason why 9 million people tuned in. This hectic two hour romp through the inner circle of both Rob & Amber's universe did nothing if not solidify Rob's eminence as — tagged by myself in my AR7 Finale piece — the increasingly odd... “unfeminized American male”: a fossilized American artifact stuck suspended in amber (forgive the pun) — within a media-infused-nation where the men are either gay or befuddled dopes under the whip of their female taskmasters.

That is to say that Rob was very much unlike, say, the fathers of the two women up for betrothal to Charlie O'Connell in the recent The Bachelor Finale. If you caught that... these two patriarchal nitwits said not a word during the entire program! They stayed cute, giggling and shut up their yaps while their wives expounded at extraordinary length about the future welfare of their daughters. This is certainly a shift in societal moorings. Rob Mariano wanders about almost an antique. A showpiece from another more chivalrous age. At least this is what we are led to believe...

Boston Rob speaks his mind bluntly. And he does so often and to whomever is within ear shot. As Rob & Amber's (and Oprah's!) buoyant wedding planner, Colin Cowie, said of him after several run-ins: "For a groom that really doesn't have an opinion, he really has a lot of opinion."